New Videos

2 Episodes of Jerry Seinfeld...

Father=R2 and I go to Sherman Oaks Galleria... ate at the Cheese Cake factory..

G--- What size shoe do you wear?
Father --- (with a shocking look... he knows what I am getting at?)... a... size 9

G---- (With a shocking look... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO) size 9?
Father --- 9 1/2... on one foot a 10 on the other

G--- (He isn't joking?... A nine...)

Moment of silence.....

G--- You are kind of tall for a 9 shoe ( He's got to be joking... but Jay Leno doesn't have big feet... and he is still SEA BISCUIT)


. I had the worst salad ever... with beets and beans... gross... pleasant conversations... going nice..

He wants to go to the movies but doesn't' see anything he likes... I suggest Religious by Mill Maher...

during this religious movie... um... we started making out... interesting... no one was in the theater... okay... then

(Place Episode of Seinfeld)

Jerry --- How did the date go?

Elane--- (cleaning her glasses... sits on the couch and says)... He took it out

Jerry --- He took it out?

Elaine--- He took (breathing on the glasses... ) ha ha... it out

Yepper... people he took it out...

(another episode of Seinfeld)

Newman---- Your son was making out during Schindler's List
Parents--- No... not Jerry... during Schindler's List?

Yepper... I made out during Religuous... what ever you think happened... you are right... AHHHHHHHHHHHHH
--------
I'm on my way home... it's about 4.30 PM

PK--- Are we still going to see Ivan...
(he sounded kind of down)

G--- Sure...(Ahhhhhhhhh)
We go see Ivan... had a great talk with Ivan... Ivan looks fine but is in a lot of pain...(Ivan eating chocolate that PK snuck him)(Ivan after scratching his balls... so nasty) I told him that's what he gets for singing the old' familiar slave tune... Jimmy Crack Corn... Bye Ivan!

PK is hungry... we go to Whole Foods... OMG... the place is about to close... he takes forever sampling all of the soups...
about 8 different kinds of soup... he says he doesn't like the bisque ( NO SOUP FOR YOU)

the store is announcing please check out... by this time we are the only ones in the store...

G--- Come on the store is closing ... they manager guy is looking at us

PK--- We are in the store and they can't kick us out...

OMG!

Finally we go through the register... and I am heading out the door... the security guards are out side... and PK... turns to the right... and sits in the eating area...

G--- This place is closed ... it's after 10?
PK---- Are you always going to nag... we are costumers and they will be here for another hour cleaning up and stuff...

He has Clam Chowder, Lamb Stew, Gelato ( Ice cream type of stuff) and a tray of two bite brownies

Okay Fightn' Mad Mary... knows how this guy eats... military or just out of jail style..

he is humorous... I watch him dunk his brownies into his soup...
WHOLE FOODS Turns off the lights...I am so embarrassed.. but still like... this guy is funny but not ha ha but like" What is going to happen next?"

he takes forever... they turn back on the lights because clearly we are not leaving ...

after that we go to Starbucks...

PK tells me about a girl that he loved... a Flip (his words)... the got along well until the family intervened....

kind of sad... they talked about marriage... and the last he heard from her was 5 months ago... they were together last holidays...

hmmmmmmm

He wants to come in ... once again... it's late like 2AM...

PK--- You sleepy

G--- (Yeah go home)... yes...

Yada yada yada... he says why don't you do me first then I will put on a condom... yada yada yada... he goes to SLEEP! I GET NOTHING!!!! just bad breath

I'm talking snoring... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

3.40 AM... he wakes up and leaves...

I wasn't sad... but I know that this is goodbye... I tried to justify everything else ... but he had it good... didn't have to take me anywhere... didn't have to buy me anything... just show up... I wanted some company... what a waste of SIZE 12 shoe...
AHHHHHHHHHH Size 12 I say...

(moment of silence)


Remember... Size doesn't matter... it really doesn't